Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Pony Boy

I once saw the Arcade Fire play in Milwaukee on bill that included The Unicorns (who I call the Hughnicorns) and my friends' band The Holy Mary Motor Club. I enjoyed The "A.F"s performance a great deal. I went up to the table where the girl in the band who dates the singer (not the girl in the band who wasn't dating the singer) was sitting, and handed her a piece of paper that had some kind of terrible poem with the word "fart" in it. This other person named Anthony was standing next to me. We were vaguely trash-talking Montreal to her. The next day I stood up in a wedding and read a poem about love, having been asked to do so. The person in the bride's party just read a Kenneth Koch poem. Which I should have done because Kenneth Koch probably knew more about love then I do. The sun just came out. I now have a new understanding of the title to one of Kenneth's early works, When The Sun Tries To Go On. It could be like in the show biz sense of "Sun! You're on!". In a way, Kenneth Koch was the Lorne Michaels of that poem. Enter sun stage left. Huh?
Huh? And the clouds have weight problems and stage fright. Or is it I who has those issues? What if I owned a motorcycle, like a Honda Goldwing? Do you think people would call me Honda Hauser? "There goes Honda Hauser on his Goldwing, off to another night of crime fighting." If you would like to be rescued by a pudgey man on a Honda Goldwing, please leave a comment in the comment box. I have a friend who once said, "What if Jesus were a Cyclops?", and I laughed for nearly five minutes. We were at Dairy Queen, and I always think of seeing the film The Outsiders and how there's a scene where Pony Boy is eating some sort of Sloppy Joe-type sandwich. And I always wished because of that that you could get some kind of Sloppy Joe-type sandwich at Dairy Queen. I don't know about you but I think they have the best fast food burgers. The sun just started trying to come out again. If you disagree that Dairy Queen has the best fast food burgers, please leave a comment in the comment box. Sometimes when I am talking to a visiting poet, I think it might be less awkward if we were at Dairy Queen. I once wrote a poem that is as follows:

Bless You

We fall asleep
inside Dairy Queen

We wake up
outside Dairy Queen

If you think that is scary, please leave a comment in the comment box. Joe Massey was asking people to help him name a press, and I just thought of Pony Boy Press. I am laughing now, but I think I may actually use it at some point. Now the sun is behind a cloud again, but it looks as though at some point it won't be.

10 comments:

AB said...

Gosh Mike I looked all over to find you a mp3 of the Urge Overkill song Dropout:

"hanging out at the parking lot of dairy queen."

I'll keep looking.

stay golden!

Robert J. said...

anne cannot use lines from the outsiders. i thought i told her that.

mike, i am leaving a comment in the comment box because i think you should move to Lawrence, KS (aka Larry).

also, i was at that show. it was real slam-bang, all around.

also, DQ has pretty good burgers, but i'm not sure they are the best.

also, please rescue me on a goldwing as Howling Honda Hauser. you should howl while riding it.

nothing gold can stay. i remember that sloppy joe. who else ate one?

Robert J. said...

also, the line is "stay gold".

also, i have copyright on all things outsiders, but pony boy also means a young asian boy-whore or something like that so if you use it in that sense you could use it. just make sure that people know.

Mike Hauser said...

You guys are sweet.

Mike Hauser said...

You were at that show? Weren't we speaking then?

Robert J. said...

It was 2004, and i think we knew each other, but we had yet to become the Voltron that we are today, Mike.

Weldon Gardner Hunter said...

I used to think that Dairy Queen had good burgers when I was a young lad at Mount Royal College in Calgary (where there was a DQ at the food court), but man -- they microwave their burgers!! I got sick of the soggy DQ burger taste! Mebbe it's different in the US (as you know, I think the fast food in the US is AMAZING), but I can't go back to DQ. I'm now an A&W man. And Harvey's is good, too!

Yum!

Mike Hauser said...

I guess if I did have a DQ burger now (there aren't really DQs close to my house) it might not be as good. But here's what I liked about them: they were "charbroiled", they had yellow buns that were soft and they were compact without being chintzy. I used to go through the Slinger WI DQ drivethru after school everyday. I had a car and I wanted to excercise that freedom y'know get a little crazy. And how did I do that? Eating. Take it easy girls, I'm here all night.

Weldon Gardner Hunter said...

"trash-talking Montreal"? But Montreal rules! You were probably dissing the music scene there, though. Keep in mind it's made up of people from Victoria who move there to "make it big." Anglos, not Francos. I have a poem called "Tight Montreal Pants" which I feel was pretty spiffy.

This was a very "stream-of-consciousness" comment, n'est pas?

Mike Hauser said...

Well I really enjoyed their show and I have this habit of really acting like a jerk to people I admire. I have to say the Unicorns were kind of dicks that night. They played the Laverne and Shirlie theme, because that show was set in Milwaukee. If you lived in Cleveland, would you want some "indie" band to come to your town and be all like "Hey Drew Carey"? Montreal is probably a cool city tho.